不再迷信大牌,学不好英语连看童书都要打折扣——评《阿文的小毯子》(阿文的小毯子的书评)

信息来源:豆瓣 作者:塔下人 时间:08月12日
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书给5星,翻译给4星。

初读《阿文的小毯子》,就被这个故事打动。很多孩子都有他们自己的“小毯子”,所以我的孩子也马上就把这本书列为最爱之一。该书获得过凯迪克奖,翻译是童书界大名鼎鼎的方素珍。直到有一天,找到了该书的英文原版《Owen》的动画,完美的印象破灭了。(英文原版的文字我附在书评最后,感兴趣的读者可以自行研究。)


虽然我自己平时看小说的时候,对故事的兴趣远大于文字。但我一向认为儿童书的语言非常重要,尤其是对正在学说话的低龄儿童,不能缺少好的文字的熏陶。先看中文版的文字时,因为大人的成熟,和故事的精彩,并没有觉得文字有什么不对。等到看过英文版时,才发觉译者的发挥抹去了原文语言上的很多特色。下面我就简略的列出我的一些感想。


英文版中提到小毯子时,特别给它起了一个名字“Fuzzy”(我觉得可以翻译成“绒绒”)。相信很多家长都有体会,很多小孩子对他们特别喜欢的东西都会起个名字,书中的阿文也不例外,可是译者却把这一很能体现小孩子的心理特点的称呼给省略了,代之以很普通的”小毯子“。


接下来,谈到阿文到哪都带着小毯子,小毯子沾满了污渍时,英文版用了两次“And Fuzzy did”(还有后面的“And Fuzzy was”)。这里小小孩的自我中心的思维方式和特点跃然纸上。可是译者却把它们略去了。另外,我觉得英文版中这两段的行文次序也体现了小孩子的思维特点。译者重新组织的文字显得略有平淡。


等到隔壁的阿姨出场时,英文版专门给她起了个名字“Mrs. Tweezers”。Tweezers是钳子,镊子的意思,这里我觉得有些讽刺的意味。小孩子是很喜欢给人起醒目的外号。译者的“隔壁的阿姨”就略有平淡。另外,Mrs. Tweezers的“filled them in”也很有意思,译者也略掉了。


阿文的爸妈讲毛毯小精灵的礼物时,英文版中用到了“an absolutely wonderful, positively perfect,especially terrific big-boy gift”,这一串排比的形容词,把父母为了安抚孩子不停许愿的场面表现的很生动。英文版中这串排比形容词在后面还出现过一次,与前面的相呼应对比,很有意味。译文中把这串排比形容词简化了并分拆成句子,在后面也没有了重复。


整体而言,英文版的语言简洁,句式重复性高,很适合小孩子学语言。而中文版的语言重组,常常句式略长,行文更成人化些。译者为了译文的流畅性,牺牲了不少英文版的有特色的文字。译者有时还自行加入了英文版中没有的很多描述画面的文字,使得文字更加略显冗长,让人想起了很多绘本里夹带的颇有中国特色的导读文章。对比《Owen》 一书的原文和翻译时,让我想起以前看过的一篇讨论著名法国小说《红与黑》的译本比较的文章,提到有的译本为了译文的流畅,对原文重组的很厉害,甚至抹去原文中的好多有文化特色的典故和专有名词却不留注释,可以称作是再创作了。举个极端的例子,就好比面对一首传世的唐诗和诗后常见的现代语言的翻译,仅仅明白意思和原版文字的魅力之间还是相差很大的。所以说,文字顺畅的译本,也不一定就是很好的反映了原作,要想仔细品味原版的精彩,还是要学习语言,哪怕是对简单的童书而言。


目前的童书市场,对一些已经版权过期的外国经典作品,版本简直多的让人眼花。有时看到翻译大为不同的两个译本时,不禁疑问到底哪个是原作者的故事,哪个是译者的转述。对于英文的作品,我就忍不住想看看原文。《Owen》的原文不难,有兴趣者可以自己咀嚼一下味道。

Owen had a fuzzy yellow blanket.

He'd had it since he was a baby.

He loved it with all his heart.


"Fuzzy goes where I go," said Owen.

And Fuzzy did.

Upstairs, downstairs, in-between.

Inside, outside, upside down.


"Fuzzy likes what I like," said Owen.

And Fuzzy did.

Orange juice, grape juice, chocolate milk.

Ice cream, peanut butter, applesauce cake.


"Fuzzy's messy!"


"Isn't he getting a little old to be carrying that thingaround?" asked Mrs. Tweezers.

"Haven't you heardof the Blanket Fairy?"

Owen's parents hadn't.

Mrs. Tweezers filled them in.


That night,

Owen's parents told Owen

to put Fuzzy under his pillow.


In the morningFuzzy would be gone,

but the blanket fairywould leave

an absolutely wonderful, positively perfect,especially terrific big-boy giftin its place.


Owen stuffed Fuzzy inside his pajama pants

and went to sleep.


"No Blanket Fairy," said Owen in the morning.

"No kidding," said Owen's mother.

"No wonder," said Owen's father.


"Fuzzy's dirty," said Owen's mother.

"Fuzzy's torn and ratty," said Owen's father.

"No," said Owen, "Fuzzy is perfect."

And Fuzzy was.


Fuzzy played Captain Plunger with Owen.

Fuzzy helped Owen become invisible.


And Fuzzy was essentialwhen it came to nail clippings

and haircutsand trips to the dentist.


"Can't be a baby forever," said Mrs. Tweezers

"Haven't you heard of the vinegar trick?

"Owen's parents hadn't.

Mrs. Tweezers filled them in.


When Owen wasn't looking,his father dipped Owen's

favorite cornerof Fuzzy into a jar of vinegar.

Owen sniffed it and smelled it and sniffed it.

He picked a new favorite corner.


Then he rubbed the smelly corner all around his sandbox,

buried it in the garden, and dug it up again.

"Good as new." said Owen.


Fuzzy wasn't very fuzzy anymore.

But Owen didn't mind.

He carried it.

And wore it.

And dragged it.


He sucked it.

And hugged it.

And twisted it.


"What are we going to do?" asked Owen's mother.

"School is starting soon," said Owen's father.

"Can't bring a blanket to school,"said Mrs. Tweezers.

"Haven't you heardof saying no?"

Owen's parents hadn't.

Mrs. Tweezers filled them in.


"I have to bring Fuzzy to school," said Owen.

"No," said Owen's mother.

"No," said Owen's father.

Owen buried his face in Fuzzy.

He started to cry and would not stop.


"Don't worry," saidOwen's mother.

"It'll be all right,"said Owen's father.

And thensuddenlyOwen's mother said, " I have an idea!"

It was an absolutely wonderful, positively perfect, especially terrific idea


First she snipped.

And then she sewed.

Then she snipped again and sewed some more


Snip, snip, snip.

Sew, sew, sew.

"Dry your eyes."

"Wipe your nose."

Hooray, hooray, hooray!


Now Owen carries one of his not so fuzzyhandkerchiefs

with him wherever he goes...


And Mrs. Tweezers doesn't say a thing.


参考资料:

    Owen 阿文的小毯子 孩子的安慰物,尊重,取舍,变通 -爱乐娃玩英语 - 爱乐娃泽妈 Elva(网文)Scholastic Storybook Treasures - Owen
阿文的小毯子
作者:(美)凯文·亨克斯 文/图
书籍:阿文的小毯子